Job Perks

One of the perks of my job is that I am gifted with the opportunity to name new students. They keep their Korean name, but are given an English name upon arriving to class. It seems the reason for this is none other than to make it easier for the native English teachers who want to call on a kid but are terrible at reading Korean script. And, when I say 'native English teachers,' I really mean 'me.'

At first, I was a little surprised. I mean, it makes sense - I would otherwise butcher their real names, as would other English teachers that have been before me and will come after me.

It also bothered me a little bit. Name giving is a solemn matter, and to be placed in such a position poses a sort of ethical dilemma. One could inadvertently screw over the kid by naming him something insidious, or one might doom a child to forever be chuckled at whenever he introduces himself to English speakers as, say, "Alphondus" or "Eggbert."

Keeping this point in mind, it seems that those who have come before me have, for the most part, tried to walk a straight line. There are numerous Tinas and Davids, Jennifers and Erics, so on and so on.

However, there are a select few kids that have, for better or worse, been given odd names. Three students' names that come to mind are "Snake," "Fletch" and "Conan."

The kids must be named, doubtless. As much as I want to name a kid "Thor" and "Pixie," I would feel ashamed if later in life they hate the names they have been given. Thus, the American in me has decided upon a democratic process of sorts. Whenever a student is in need of a name, I list ten names of the appropriate gender on the board and let them decide which one they want, sounding out each name multiple times so they can get a feel for what their English persona will become.

Take today, for instance. I had a new male student, and so I gave him a list of ten names to choose from: Thor, Indiana, Will, Thoe, T.O., Chris, Lion, Tiger, etc.

Much to my dismay/delight, he chose "T.O." May it serve him well.

p.s. Would you like me to name a kid after you? Do you have any great name ideas? Write them in the comments and I'll include them in the next list I make. If a kid picks your name, I'll be sure to let you know.